13 habits of stressed-out people

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Dale Carnegie Training Newsletter

By Anita Zinsmeister, President
Dale Carnegie® Training of Central & Southern New Jersey 

We’ve all been there: hearts racing, palms sweating, and panic rising when we realize that there is too much to do and just not enough time.

Stress can be immobilizing, and it can negatively affect many aspects of our lives.

Sometimes we just need to step back, take a mental health day, and seek ways to de-stress.

If you constantly feel like pulling your hair out, you may have some habits causing stress that need to be changed, and there’s no better time than now!

Here are some things that stressed-out people tend to do and tips to break the habits.

1. Drink too much caffeine  

We aren’t going to tell you to stop drinking caffeine altogether — we wouldn’t do that to you!

But downing several cups of coffee a day can overstimulate you and make you unnecessarily anxious and on edge.

So keep the caffeine to a minimum, and try these  tips for making your caffeinated drink healthier .

2. Constantly vent

Sometimes sitting down with a friend and letting it all out is  exactly  what we need. Venting is essential — but only in small doses.

If negative things are all you talk about, they are going to be all you think about too. People who are stressed out usually talk excessively about a problem, drag it out, and don’t let it go.

It’s best to rant your rant, get it off your chest, and then be done with it so that whatever was bothering you doesn’t bog you down.

3. Obsess over things they can’t change

We all need to accept what we can’t change, and dwelling on mistakes isn’t healthy or beneficial.

There is no point worrying about things you most likely can’t do anything about. It’s best to move on and simply do better next time!

4. Eat food that isn’t healthy

Sometimes when we’re worried, turning to a giant cheesy pizza or pint of ice cream sounds like the best thing in the world.

But feeding stressed feelings usually leaves us worse off, both mentally and physically. If you’re tempted to snack while feeling anxious, try  foods that may help with anxiety .

5. Get overwhelmed easily

Everyone feels overwhelmed sometimes, but the key is not to get panicked when you realize that you have more to do than you thought you did.

Take a deep breath, choose one item on your list to start with, and go from there.

Trying to multitask or do parts of things here and there will leave everything half-finished and sloppy.

6. Don’t get enough sleep

Sleep deprivation makes you sluggish, cranky, and overall not your best self.

Eliminate this contributing factor to stress by trying some tips to help you get the  best sleep possible  so that you wake up rejuvenated and ready to go! If you’re feeling crafty, you can try making this  DIY   sleep spray .

7. Overanalyze

Ever spent hours after a conversation worrying if you said something wrong, should have said something differently, offended someone, or ruined your chances at a promotion?

You’re probably the only one who noticed any of that, but people who stress tend to pick apart every little thing in life (work or otherwise) and find problems where problems don’t exist.

Stay positive about yourself! You’re awesome, and the worry is all in your head!

8. Don’t exercise

When we are super busy and trying to eliminate tasks to lighten the load, exercise can be one of the first things that goes. Don’t let that happen!

It may take a little time out of your day, but it’s a perfect way to get those endorphins flowing and that motivation going. You can always squeeze in some  light exercises before bed  to help de-stress and get a good night’s sleep!

9. Overload their schedules

There are only 24 hours in one day, and sometimes we try to pack in more than we can realistically handle in that time.

People who stress tend to bite off more than they can chew, and then realize after the fact that they are swamped. Plan out your day ahead of time so that you know what to expect.

Take on what you know you can do, leave room in case something unexpected happens, and pace yourself for each task.

10. Try to do everything on their own

A lot of high-stress people have a “if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself” mentality, and they have too much on their plates sometimes because of this.

But truthfully, you get by with a little help from your friends!

Let other people give you a hand from time to time — you may be surprised at how well they do the task and how nice it is not to have to go it alone.

11. Focus on the bad instead of the good

Bad days will come, but they will also go. People who worry a lot tend to only focus on the negative, and they forget to leave room for contemplating the positive.

Instead of clinging to the bad news, seek out the good news, and try to do more  things that happy people do !

12. Procrastinate

Procrastination leads to panic — and that’s when stress levels go to the next level. It’s best to buckle down, suck it up, and get things done.

Mapping out your tasks and making a plan can help make things seem more doable and less stressful.

13. Rush through life

Stressed-out people can get so consumed with being anxious about pretty much everything that they forget to enjoy the best things in life.

What’s the point of all that stressing if you can’t even enjoy the hard work you’re putting into things? Take a minute to  slow down  and find your own happiness, wherever that may be for you.


Read the original article on POPSUGAR Smart Living. Copyright 2016. Follow POPSUGAR Smart Living on Twitter.

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7 Quick Tips To Improve Your Leadership Skills

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This week’s blog comes from 

Dale Carnegie Training Newsletter

By Anita Zinsmeister, President
Dale Carnegie® Training of Central & Southern New Jersey

7 Quick Tips To Improve
Your Leadership Skills
  • Word count for this issue: 562
  • Approximate time to read: 2.2 minutes @ 250 words per minute 
When a crisis hits, an executive’s instinct might be to focus on greater efficiency and productivity by tightening control.  But this is not always the best solution-giving up authority and granting employees independence can actually help improve innovation and success, even when the road gets rough.
So You Are A Leader At Your Company-Now What?
Without the proper leadership skills, you will find it hard to inspire your staff.  Below you will find 7 tips on how to brush up on your leadership skills.
7 Tips To Improve Your Leadership Skills
1.  Show Respect – If you want to be in a leadership position, start building relationships with people by respecting what they do.  Practically nothing is more important.   Additionally, it is important that a great leader never misses an opportunity to learn more about the people behind them.  Great leaders never skip an employee’s birthday gathering or a holiday party because they are too busy — they know that work will always be there. 
2.  Build on Relationships – As a leader, know who people are, what is important to them, and what motivates them.  This will help you understand everyone’s goals and how you can support your staff.  When you help people, they will care about you and your goals in return.
3.  Have a Good Attitude – Positive attitudes can be infectious.  As a leader, you need to find ways to stay upbeat and find the best ways to improve.  Do not expect too much from your staff — no one is perfect; while you do need to address poor performance, it is extremely important to acknowledge a job well done, which will build a positive work environment where people feel appreciated.
4.  Work on Your Strengths – Figure out what your strengths and weaknesses are.  While it is important to address your weaknesses, you might find it better to first start by focusing on your strengths.  This will allow you to rise to the expert level sooner than you would by working on your weaknesses.  Bottom line: Know what you are good at and keep at it.
5.  Find People Who Complement You – Again, we all have strengths and weaknesses.  Great leaders are aware of their weaknesses and find people who support their shortcomings.  This is not because they are weak and need to cover themselves, but because they know the benefit of having a strong team — and when the team wins, everyone wins. 
6.  Develop A Mentoring Program  – Mentoring someone will not only help develop that person’s career, but will also help leaders refine their skills.  It is a great way to help improve your staff members’ skills while also improving on relationships.
7.  Maintain Balance In Your Life – A big key to success is learning to balance work and family.  Life is too short for you to live at your job. Great leaders set career boundaries and know when to spend more time with family and friends.  Doing this will make you a stronger leader.
Executive Summary:  While some people are just great leaders, others have to work a bit harder to achieve the necessary skills.  Take the time to consider your strengths and weaknesses and get to know your staff; surround yourself with the best possible people to become an excellent leader. 
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Budgeting — beyond the basics

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This is Tip No. 16 from Larry Litwin’s The ABCs of Strategic Communication and More ABCs. Both should be part of your strategic communication library.

1.Budgets are a necessary evil.

They’re the only practical way to get a grip on your spending so you can make sure your money is being used the way you want it

to be used.

2. Creating a budget generally requires three steps.

• Identify how you spend money now.

• Evaluate your current spending and set goals that take into account your financial objectives.

• Track your spending to make sure it stays within those guidelines.

3.Use software to save grief

• Quicken®

• Microsoft Money®

4. Don’t drive yourself nuts.

Once you determine which categories of spending can and should be cut (or expanded), concentrate on those categories and worry

less about other aspects of your spending.

5.Watch out for cash leakage.

If withdrawals from the ATM machine evaporate from your pocket without apparent explanation, it’s time to keep better records.

6. Spending beyond your limits is dangerous.

But if you do, you’ve got plenty of company – but it’s definitely a sign you need to make some serious spending cuts.

7. Beware of luxuries dressed up as necessities.

If your income doesn’t cover your costs, then some of your spending is probably for luxuries – even if you’ve been considering them

to be filling a real need.

8.Tithe yourself.

Aim to spend no more than 90 percent of your income. That way, you’ll have the other 10 percent left to save for your big-picture


9. Don’t count on windfalls.

When projecting the amount of money you can live on, don’t include dollars that you can’t be sure you’ll receive, such as 

year-end bonuses, tax refunds or investment gains.

10. Beware of spending creep.

As your annual income climbs from raises, promotions and smart investing, don’t start spending for luxuries until you’re sure that

you’re staying ahead of inflation.

Source: www.money.cnn.com/pf/101/lessons/2/

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Grow Your People — Produce Better Results

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Thanks to:

Dale Carnegie Training Newsletter

By Anita Zinsmeister, President
Dale Carnegie® Training of Central & Southern New Jersey

9 Tips For Improving
Your Next Meeting
  • Word count for this issue: 571
  • Approximate time to read: 2.3 minutes @ 250 words per minute 
Time is one of your most precious resources and the last thing you want to do is waste it.  While business meetings can be a great way to get your team on the same page and to hear about new ideas, they can also be huge time suckers.  It is extremely important that you do everything in your power to ensure that your next meeting is a success.
9 Tips To Help Improve Your Next Business Meeting:
In order to help you have more success, we have listed below nine tips for getting the most out of your next business meeting.
1.  Have A Clear Objective – Before setting up your next meeting, think about what it is you want to accomplish and relay this to your staff.  You want everyone to be on the same page.
2.  Be Timely – If you say you are going to start a meeting at 3:00, then start it at 3:00.  No one likes to wait.  The same goes with the end of a meeting — end it on time.  Be prompt.  It shows that you respect everyone involved and they will appreciate it.
3.  Ask Questions And Get Clarification – Do not understand something?  Ask questions to clarify what has been said or agreed upon.  Be sure to keep your inquiries clear and concise, so everyone can be on board.
4.  Keep An Open Mind – Having a negative attitude will not get you anywhere.  Go into a meeting with the mentality that you will learn something new.  Listen to what others have to say before speaking and do not interrupt; instead write your thoughts down and address them at an appropriate time.  Be sensitive and do not criticize other people for their thoughts and ideas.
5.  Preparation Is The Name Of The Game – Think ahead of time and develop questions or issues that you would like to discuss before your next meeting.  Send a quick e-mail asking everyone involved to go through the same process.
6.  Write Things Down – Taking good notes can be very useful.  Never assume that you will remember every detail of what was discussed — jot things down — you will thank yourself later. 
7.  Offer Your Two Cents – Do your best to participate by offering ideas and possible solutions (which is a great way to help prevent your mind from wondering).  If you have an idea that you feel is important, share it as sharing often sparks new ideas and adds energy to a meeting.
8.  Put Your Smartphone Down – People might grumble, but it is not a bad idea to ask everyone to silence or turn off their phones.  This way there are far fewer distractions and everyone can really participate in the meeting.
9.  Summarize Action Items – At the end of the meeting, briefly run through what was discussed and who is responsible for getting things done.  Also, make sure everyone is on the same page and understands what must happen next.
Executive Summary:  With a little effort, preparation, and proper management, your next meeting will be a great success.  Take the time to make a plan, keep an open mind, and take the time to really understand what is being said.  Use these tips to make the most out of your next business meeting. 
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